Wishing my life away…..

Feeling a bit down this week and I don’t know why, well I do, but nothing major has happened, we are still plodding along.

We saw all the extended family at the weekend and there was excited talk of next years holidays, ‘where are you going?’ we were asked.

‘Camping probably’ was our reply

‘Why don’t you treat yourselves to somewhere warm? You never go away’

‘But we like camping’ (we really do!)

‘Oh, ok’

No more talk of holidays

Mr Rubys sister has a new car that everyone was drooling over, we were asked when we were going to replace ours – she is getting rather old now.

‘Why? There is no need, it still runs…..’

It felt like we were on the defensive all the time, probably paranoia on my part though

I have chased the variation to request that the statutory interest is removed from our proposal this week and have had a response back to say that the variation is currently with our IP and will be sent to us for approval shortly. I am usually the proverbial optimist so why do I feel so worried about this? I think that seeing the figures in black and white were terrifying, with fees and interest our debt had doubled and we owe nearly 92K but started with a debt of 58K – We have paid in over 62K so far and are still waiting for a 9K PPI claim to be paid. I know we will only see about 45% of that claim.

But then I argue with myself that this is money that we would have had to pay back in interest had we not embarked on the IVA journey, I also tell myself that we would never have cleared this debt in 5 years had we gone it alone. We didn’t know at the time when our debt was becoming unmanageable that our finances would improve somewhat. I have never regretted the decision that we took, just regretted the choices that we made that put us in the position that we were in. But then fate pays a part doesn’t it? We don’t put ourselves in debt for the fun of it, I’ve mentioned before that we don’t have anything to show for it, none of it was frivolous spending, unless I have chosen to forget those moments!

It’s true you know, people say that the first couple of years are ok, the pressure is off and you can relax a little, I’m not saying it’s easy but compared to the alternative it is.  But when the end is in sight it’s so hard to think about anything but the end, the all consuming, can’t think about anything else end.

I am going round in circles and need to stop….

Mr Ruby had a job interview at the beginning of the week as an aircraft mechanic at the local airport, he has been on a rolling 6 month contract for the last 5 years but it looks like it will finish next year for sure which is quite worrying. The potential new job means a cut in salary but he will get holiday and sick pay and we will save £80/£90 a week in fuel so it has to be worth it. He had an email yesterday asking him to go back for a hand skills test tomorrow so they must like him. It also means that I can have the car back and he can walk to work! It takes me 80 minutes to get to work on two buses, this would mean my journey would drop to 20 minutes by car….. Heaven.

We may treat ourselves to a day out this weekend, we have a favourite busker who visits the town every month or so and he is so good, so I think that we are going to wrap up warm and treat ourselves to a coffee and sit on a bench tapping our feet for a couple of hours.

Have another’ happy’ week everyone

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